7.16.2009

Me Mom?

I have been caught stunned lately. Many of my comments have been calling me Mom/Mama/Mommy.... hummmm. Are they really referring to me? Am I really a Mom? Up until now I have only been a "real" Mommy to creatures with fur. How did the one thing I wanted so badly finally happen?

At what point am I considered a Mom? The day I got pregnant? The day the boys reached viability? Maybe not until they are born? How does one determine when this magic name comes into play?

I got a very sweet call from my Dad last night. One of those calls that just sort of makes you want to burst out into tears. He said that he was having dinner and "we" crossed his mind. The FOUR of us crossed his mind and he had to call and tell us how proud and happy he was. You could hear it in his voice, he is just bursting with pride. And no he wasn't just proud because of the boys or because of how far we have come to have the boys, but more just for who Gabe and I are and what we have achieved in life. It was very sweet and made me feel accomplished, although my biggest accomplishment yesterday was creating an ipod playlist for the baby shower. I may not be gifted with a talent that I can share with the world, or have some fancy high paying job, but we are good hard working people. Infertility brought us over $30,000 in debt. My Dad paid off $1,500 of that before IVF #3, and at this point we only left with four more monthly payments. I began working at the age of 15, started taking college courses at night after school at 16, moved out at 19, and owned a home at 22. For things like this, our marriage, and the boys my Dad is proud.

Laptop fixed... it was just the charger! My friends are back.

I posted on FF yesterday in the October board, which I haven't done in awhile. It was amazing to see how many of them had been following me via blog. Which leads me to wonder how many people are actually reading? Who is just lurking? I am really curious. Come out come out where ever you are and drop me a comment.

I better get moving and get in the shower. I have an OB appointment and I must admit that I am nervous. I am afraid that these contractions I have been having are changing my cervix. I am so afraid they will admit me to the hospital today. Please please say a little prayer. I really don't want to be admitted yet and I would really like to make it to my baby shower this Saturday.

*UPDATE* All is well!!!! Cervix is actually measuring a 1.4, so still stable and VERY closed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Baby shower here we come!!!!!! This OB was GREAT! Very thorough and took the time to answer questions and go over my chart. I passed my glucose test with flying colors and DO NOT have gestational diabetes. Thyroid levels are good and I guess my blood count is fantastic for carrying twins. How about that? I am now measuring 36 weeks pregnant and have gained 23 pounds (GULP). How in the world did that happen? This bedrest really makes the weight come on. The boys looked good and now we are about 98% sure we are going c-section. Both boys are still in the same positions and it is unlikely they will change positions now, not much room to move around. Oh and thank you all for commenting, I love to see who is lurking around.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lurker here, I usually use your blog roll. :) I have seen you on FF too. We did IVF and I am pregnant with baby boy #1, but not quite as far as you. I am 20 weeks 2 days. I don't have a google or any other blog account so I have to post anonymous and I don't like to do that, thus I lurk. :) GL with your appt. today!!
Tracy

Hernandez Clan said...

You my love are a MOM!!!! WOOHOO. P.S. I think the name is officially official when your little ones make your bladder shrink and you start to crave things you wouldn't otherwise. LOL. I think that comes before viability that things are "clear" or even before you can make out features. Some may say you are a mom the day that little egg is "fertilized" but come on...you are TRULY inducted when you pee every 30 seconds (no joke). GO ahead...let the laughs out!! P.S. I am so not a lurker but I am officially addicted to this blog!

Feris said...

Hy I´m a lurker too. I am from Mexico and I have been reading your blog since you where like 8 weeks pregnant and although I have commented a few times I don´t always do it. But be sure I´m praying for your baby boys!

Anna Kauz said...

I'm mostly a lurker from Florida, I don't even remember how I stumbled across your blog, but I'm rooting for you!

If you are super curious, you can always set up a meter, I use site meter, and it will tell you how many hits a day, where people are reading, and tons of other info for free!!

Oh and btw, I think you are a mommy the day you get pregnant :).

Alicia_B said...

I have been following you for awhile too and saw you on FF first. You have been a great inspiration for me! My hubby and I did IVF and we are expecting a boy. I love following your progress!

Jackie said...

Fellow FF here....but probably a lurker! I have you on my blog list and I love reading your updates. We are adopting internationally and I love reading updates on blogs while I "wait" for our referral

Christina said...

You know I'm here!!! Just call me stalker!!! ;))

Melissa said...

Hi there, I'm a lurker too! Probably for about 3 months now. I found your blog through another blog and I'm so glad to hear things are still going well for you after some scary times! Best wishes :)

Mama Tina said...

Tiffy....you became a Mommy, when you were a little girl, the day you picked up your first baby doll and cuddled her close to your heart.

The first time I witnessed your expertise of being a Mother is when you started caring for Elianna (amost 12 years ago) I believe you were around 15 years old and just beginning your life long relationship with my Son your DH. Watching you care for Elianna as if she was your own I knew then, so many years ago:) That you were going to be the best, caring and loving Mama a child could ever have.

Then seven years ago, you started helping me care for our "Wild" but prescious Amanda.

Then, came along "our" Tito "Juan" even though he's only 8 years younger than you. He did and still does consider you "one" of his Mom's. As he often says "My Mom" #3

I wish I knew how to use my scanner so that I could post pictures of all these wonderful children who have considered you as being their Mother at one time or another. Maybe you could do that for me? Show the Blog World your "Kids":)

Aaden and Noah are so very lucky to have you as their Mommy.

The only difference with these "Little Boys" is , once they are home, they are home to stay.

So there you have it, you "sweetheart" have already been a "Mother" for a very long time!!!

Can't wait to see you and my Son tomorrrow night!!!

Love you ....mean it

Mama

Tiffany said...

Mama Tina, thank you so much for the sweet comment. That sweet little Elianna is right here bugging me looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. We are all looking forward to it!!!

agk11808 said...

hi avid reader here. i don't remember for sure how i came across your blog, maybe from "hoping for our own peanut" i actually found out i was pregnant after you i am 19 weeks today. Keep them boys cooking :)

ktmo99 said...

Another lurker here from FF. *blush* I have been reading your blog for awhile and I can't wait to see your two little boys. You have come so far.

Hernandez Clan said...

Yeah for the update!!!!

Nikki said...

I am a lurker and I've been following your story. Hoping you make it a while longer before your boys join you!

MJS said...

Well, I too am a lurker :) I have 7 year old twin boys and have spent the last couple months getting into the blog world. I read your entire blog from start to finish the last 3 days. I am so excited for you and can remember all those scary feelings. The funny thing is there isn't any advice that makes things any different. Those boys will come when they want to come now (but we will keep praying they stay put for a while). I know how bad bed rest sucks I was put on bed rest at 10 weeks and could be up two half days a week, NOT FUN. If you ever have a question regarding twins or anything of that sort, be sure and ask, if I have an answer I will be sure and let you know!! Take care before long this stage of your life will to be over :)

Meant to be a mom said...

I think I was one of those people who called you mom. I feel like once you concieve your technically a mom. Especially after all the sacrifice and bedrest to make sure they stay in and stay healthy. Those are selfless acts that definitely make you a mom.

Helene said...

I found your blog through Tiffany's blog and I've just enjoyed reading your posts. It actually makes me miss being pregnant (did I really just write that??)

I'm so happy to read that you and the babies are doing so well! And after reading this post, I can see why your dad is so proud of you all!

Keep hanging in there!!!

Cassandra said...

Not a lurker, since I've commented before, but I'm here as a fellow IF'er who is now pregnant with twins.

Hooray for your great OB visit!

Jess said...

In my opinion, the day you conceived your little boys, you becamse their MAMA/MOM/MOMMY!

Great update! So glad to hear all is well with you three!

babyparamore.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Just a lurker :)
From FF Oct board... Love your update on the boys and they are in all of our prayers.
Miranda

Anonymous said...

Just a lurker :)
From FF Oct board... Love your update on the boys and they are in all of our prayers.
Miranda

Courtney said...

Tiffany,

I am a big fan! I am actually 1 day ahead of you in my pregnancy, and deal with PCOS. I'm so excited for you and your boys! I love reading your updates--Keep up the good work, Mama!

Anonymous said...

hey!!
I started reading your blog about a week ago.. I was googling "twins cerclage", because I am 18w5d pregnant with b/g twins. We struggled for six years to concieve, and this is our first pregnancy. At 16 weeks I had requested a cervix check and it was 3cm but funneling down to 1.5.. and then closing back up. I guess they call that dynamic. Three different perinatologists said we should just monitor it while on strict bedrest, so after 3checks, it was down to about 1cm, and no longer dynamic.. just a big U shape inside. We were then advised to place a cerclage and had that done yesterday... now we just wait and see what is going to happen. It is soooooooo nerve-racking and a totally testing my ability to trust God.. I am an admitted control freak, and being in bed while husband and sister are "cleaning" and "cooking" is a whole different kind of torture :O)..
I enjoyed reading your story and hope you keep posting! I may start a blog at some point soon~ Take care!
Anna in California (annajanine*at*gmail.com)

tory said...

Oh, me! Remember me? We did IVF one day apart, and I'm expecting a little girl :) I've been following your blog the entire time, cheering along with you and sharing all your updates with my husband.

I think we're moms at whatever point we start making major sacrifices and life changes for our kids. So giving up drinking, dealing with morning sickness, all the way up to staying on bedrest all qualify us for the title! I gotta say though, it will be amazing to first hear the little one call me mommy :D