I'd Never...

I'd never allow a friend to hook us up with "pork loin roast" when we really should have been charged for gourmet sausages

I'd never scream and curse when the darn Christmas lights didn't follow my damn directions for staying put around the window

I'd never feel a little let down when we pulled up to our house and things were just as we left them and our lives are just as they once were

I'd never admit that being away from the norm makes me feel much better

I'd never admit that on our vay-cay it had been almost a day since I talked or even thought about IF or IVF and it felt damn good

I'd never skip my vitamins because I was pretty sure I would just puke them up anyway

I'd never despise my insurance company for covering NADA of a $180 blood test to check HCG from retrieval day (just saw the bill today... lets just add it to the rest of the bills.. hoping they will let me set up a payment plan)

I'd never question who the heck packed the Christmas decorations away two years ago (because last year we chose not to decorate.. and of course it wasn't me two years ago)

I'd never fantasize about putting together the bassinet my MIL gave us

I'd never admit that it hurts to think we will never have that bassinet up in our house and it was oh such a waste to take it from a family whom put it to such good use

I'd never question if I am strong enough this year to do all this holiday stuff

I'd never slam the fridge door closed at the sight of fertility drugs when we got home from vay-cay

I'd never think I was blessed enough to not get the stomach bug the whole fam got this last week

I'd never have a little to much to drink on Thanksgiving day, because the Holidays are oh so easy

I'd never do a little Freegan in the dumpsters and truly LOVE it!

I'd never wish I didn't say things I said out loud

I'd never admit that I am a tiny bit envious that DH will be FRONT ROW at the Raider game tomrrow afternoon

I'd never be mapping out a plan for my next freegan adventure in my hometown

I'd never grab for a Big Gulp cup to think I would puke in numerous times on I-5

I'd never puke in 3 gas station bathrooms in Southern California

I'd never force myself to sleep just because I felt like crap

I'd never be excited to just be home tomorrow and to clean, do laundry and cook a great meal, oh how I love and miss cooking

I'd never cry during an audio book in the middle of nowhere

We'd never have a laugh attack going over numerous events. This happened in our bed during the middle of the afternoon today (of how we needed that). Oh how I love my DH.

I'd never think our dog was nuts

I'd never think so hard before I ate, and wonder how it might come out

I'd never think I was going to pull out a chain saw to cut down my shedding trees when the leaves covered my lawn in a blanket

I'd never fall in love with a brown and pink polka-a-dot apron at a speciality grocery store (who falls in love with an apron?)

I'd never allow our dog to be eating and destroying a hanger just because I am busy and don't feel like getting up right now

I'd never look over at the guy on the other couch whom is feeling slightly ill and thank my lucky stars that we found each other and that he loves me for who I am even with all my flaws

I'd never go to sleep right now without washing my face just because I don't feel so good and I am anxious to get to bed and have a solid nights sleep

I'd never pray myself to sleep with prayers that we succeeded in another miraculous break cycle conception and that the Stanford bills have been dissolved